This is the best day of my life. I am getting all kinds of attention from Carol McMaster. No sitting around here. But I’m getting ahead of myself. Let me back up and tell you the whole story. A couple of weeks ago, this guy from Nebraska called my author and actually convinced him to open hisottom desk drawer for the first time in months. All of us appreciated the fresh air and light. So far, I am the only one who has gotten any attention. Of course, I am the oldest.

In my first incarnation, I was a dissertation. That was really difficult—all those different hands working me over. Finally, that phase was done, and I sat for a year in a fancy black binder. Actually, I also was converted to microfilm and sat on a shelf at the University of Michigan. Then, about 2 years ago, there was a crazy month when I got almost more attention from my author than I could handle—10 hours a day—day after day. He is such a "binge writer."

Anyway, the next 3 months were great. First, a 2-day mail trip to Lincoln, Nebraska. Then separate trips all over the world. When I returned home to my author, I heard some deep sighs and a curse word or two. Actually, I got a brief glimpse of the letter from the associate editor; it said something about revisions that were quite "doable." Anyway, my author dumped me in the bottom desk drawer.

The next year or so was pretty dull. I was joined in the drawer by other unfinished manuscripts. Some were infants, just a page or two. Others were missing an analysis or a discussion section. Oh, I made it out of the drawer a couple of times, but not for long. Rode back and forth in his briefcase for a couple of months, but had to give up my spot to a Newsweek magazine.

As I was saying, this guy from Nebraska called, the drawer opened, and I became the center of attention—10 hours a day (the binger still lives). Anyway, I am finished now—another 2-day mail trip—a review, reference check, a few marks, and I was on my way again. This time I traveled in computer disk as well as paper form—quite a thrill. The label on the package read Decker Periodicals, Inc. I was on my way to Canada.

Knowing that my life as a manuscript is nearly over—I will be an article next, you know—I have become quite reflective. Through the years, I have talked with other unfinished manuscripts to pass time; we had plenty of it. I have made a few observations that I would like to pass along. Maybe your author will read them.

My author is a bright person. I’m pretty proud of him, most of the time. He has lots of good ideas. He has a bunch (good literary word) of data stashed in the other drawers in his office. You know, the other day he had an argument with the building manager about more file cabinets to hold his data. I wanted to scream at him "WRITE IT; DON’T STORE IT," but manuscripts don’t scream.

During the days when my author was carrying me around in his briefcase, he tried to work on me late at night. It had been a long day and, finally, about 10:30 at night, he hauled me out of the briefcase and tried to work. Neither his heart nor his head were really in it. What do you expect? This guy is great in the morning; he is alert and enthusiastic. Writing is not easy for him; he should give it his best. I realize that some people write well late at night—not my author. Just give yourself a fighting chance. Try to schedule your writing time, not use whatever time is left over. I doubt it he will live long enough to figure that one out—maybe when the kids go to college.

Most authors have no idea how the binge-writing strategies that they developed in graduate school reduce their effectiveness in "real" life. First, binge writing causes authors to overestimate the amount of work that needs to be done. Second, binge writing encourages them to delay writing until they have enough time to binge; for my author this seemed to be at least 3 days. Any period of time shorter than that and he can’t get a good binge started, I guess.

Occasionally, I see my author binge writing on a manuscript for several days. Although he makes some progress on the manuscript, his other work doesn’t get done and, after a while, he gives up the writing binge and works on other things. I always hope that he will go back to the manuscript before he loses his train of thought, but he rarely does.

I wish that he would write for an hour or two each day and then move on to his other tasks. That way, he would make progress and stay current with his other work and responsibilities. He would be surprised at his progress had he just stayed with it, but he thinks that he is too busy. Manuscripts have no way of demanding attention or setting deadlines; students do, classes do, meetings do, bosses do, children do, spouses do. You get the picture. Manuscripts just sit and wait until our authors have enough self-discipline to work on us—or until this guy from Nebraska calls.

Even when he is binge writing, I really don’t have his full attention—the phone, the secretary, the students, the kids. Of course, when he binge writes, other people want attention too, and in time they will pester him until they get it. Manuscripts can’t pester, you know. We sit around waiting until those aggressive types are done. Sometimes, I sat under a pile of tests, or phone messages, or class notes, or Newsweek magazines for days on end. Pretty demoralizing. Although my author is a nice guy, he is no Hemingway. When he writes, he needs his whole brain, not 10% of it. If he would just lock the door and clearn off his desk.

As I mentioned before, my author was pretty upset when I returned from the associate editor. He tossed me in the drawer and did not ask anyone else for help. The suggested changes were not that major, although there was one that was a little tricky. I wish that he would have asked one of his colleagues to help him. Maybe together they would have figured out a way to deal with the reviews. But, he suffered along. Although I heard him mention me to some of his friends, he never asked for help or advice. He talks with them about problems with his teaching, his boss, his car, and even his family sometimes, but he doesn’t ask for help with his writing. Kinda strange, don’t you think?

This guy from Nebraska keeps talking about developing the knowledge base of the AAC field. He thinks that my author understands him, but I don’t believe that he does. My author enjoys increasing his own knowledge base. He reads a lot. He discusses ideas with his colleagues and students. He collects data and talks about the results with his friends. He seems happy when that happens. Maybe he doesn’t understand or have confidence about his role in developing the corporate knowledge base of the AAC field. If he did, he would understand that personal knowledge is just the first step. He needs to find ways to share it with the people. You know, Leonard Bernstein said something about that being the reason why he loved to conduct orchestras: to share what he had learned with the people. I learned that from the Newsweek magazine that I mentioned earlier—but, I digress. My author doesn’t quite "get" this knowledge base business. He honestly thinks that by failing to finish a manuscript he is hurting himself. He is also robbing everyone else. Must be a tough concept.

That delivery person was a little reckless. Could have laid me down in a dignified way instead of flipping me into this basket. I am here with several other finished manuscripts. We have been talking, and some agree with my opinions. However, others tell me that their authors didn’t write everyday, but write a day or two each week. Others write a lot during the summer and collect data during the school year. I guess there are a number of wys to get your writing done, if you stick to your system.

Anyway, I’m finally here and the sign on the desk reads "Carol McMaster, Production Editor, Decker Publications, Inc." Things are starting to happen fast now. Bet I won’t spend much time in the bottom drawer here. She doesn’t even have a bottom drawer. Pass on the word: when you hit Carol’s basket, you have made it—the big time.

Electronically printed with permission from ISAAC (http://www.isaac-online.org/isaac.html)